A Commentary on Boys

So you see your son playing in the drainage water around your house in a thunderstorm. You say, "come in, you can't play in a thunderstorm, and you are tearing up the grass we are growing in the drainage area", and the reply is "why?", but he comes onto the porch. You go back in and a few minutes later see he is off the covered porch again. So you walk out and see him playing in the water that drains off the house. Again you say "out of the drainage water, it is thundering, and again you are making a muddy mess....". So you go in leaving him to "clean off his feet in order to follow you in", but he never makes it in. You go back out and find him playing in the water that has collected in a tarp he pulled into the rain. Hmmmm... Ok, so you go back out and tell him "you are killing the grass and you are still playing in a thunderstorm, get on the porch and don't get off again..". He then asks, " why don't you ever let us have any fun?" To which you reply "because I am really an ogre dressed up like a mommy!"